Robert Smith doesn't know a thing about football.

Whew, ok. Now that I've gotten that out of my system we can move on to this weekend's game. Here's the bottom line: RGIII is such an electric player that he has scored zero touchdowns against OSU in his career.

That's right. Not one.

He is so versatile an athlete that he finished with less rushing yards than Brandon Weeden in last year's game. That's a fact.

So you're going to have to excuse me if I don't believe in the hype that surrounds ESPN college football analysts' favorite player to service whilst wearing knee pads. Yes, he has great numbers. But I believe this OSU defense is exactly the type needed to extinguish the Heisman talk surrounding the quarterback of Big 12 South's forgotten team.

With all that said, let's get to the predictions. 

1. Final Score?

2. How many INT's will RGIII throw?

3. How many sacks will the OSU defense have?

4. Uniform combination?

5. Who will be the MVP? Give me some stats.

6. What shenanigans will King get himself into this weekend?

7. What did Mike Gundy do to Robert Smith that made him such a Queef?

8. Ok, we've been waiting for this one. Don't disappoint. Best pickups line for Baylor women?