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ALMOST SATIRE - Why OSU will beat Texas Tech

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Since apparently no one is getting this: these articles are satirical and mostly me being a professional hater. And you're on the chopping block now, Red Raiders.

Mark D. Smith-USA TODAY Sports

To a complete shock absolutely no one's surprise, the Oklahoma State Cowboys are undefeated at 7-0 rolling into what may be their toughest matchup of the year: the Texas Tech Red Raiders in Lubbock, Texas. This is a big maybe though seeing how the Red Raiders have one of the worst defenses in the country, let alone the conference. The black-hole of suck that is their defense is only surpassed by the Kansas Jayhawks, who nearly stole a win against the Red Raiders in Lawrence two weeks ago. The Cowboys will be gouging them on the ground and Mason Rudolph will be slicing and dicing their secondary like nobody's business. We might probably will see a record setting day for Mason and friends.

Well what about their offense? Hasn't it been putting up some eye popping numbers at home? Credit where credit is due, Patrick Mahomes, Jakeem Grant, and DeAndre Washington are all pretty good players. However, they are yet to face a defense this dominating. The only decent teams they've been able to put up good numbers on were Iowa State and a TCU who was starting third stringers due to injury. Not that impressive, Red Raiders. Get good.

Ogbah and company will be hunting Mahomes down and lighting him up more than West Virginia couches. The secondary will be smothering their receivers. There's a good chance that Tre Flowers may actually take Jakeen Grant's head off. Kevin Peterson, Ashton Lampkin, and Ramon Richards will all probably snag an interception. The Raiders don't know what is about to hit them. The Cowboys defense will knock them out of rhythm right out of the gate and Kliff won't be about to found it again.

I'm sure that some of you are worried about playing in Lubbock on Halloween. That's fair seeing that the Red Raiders knocked of No. 1 Texas on that date seven years ago on a miraculous Michael Crabtree tightrope walk. What a night for college football. However, there is no Michael Crabtree on this year's team. This team won't be going 11-2 (7-1 in conference). Hell, they're already at 5-3 (2-3).  And to top it all off, the Cowboys are riding a six game win streak against the Red Raiders, winning the last three in Lubbock by an average margin of 31.67 points.

Its going to be a long, long afternoon, Red Raider fans. So start hitting the tortillas and cheap beer and just wait for the end. It won't be coming soon.