The least interesting game this week actually provided the best content and inspired King to produce a work of art and maybe the greatest Kansas troll of all time.
David Smith from The Smoking Musket joined in the fun despite only partaking of some coffee, which is a direct violation of the PFJ's regulations, however he's from a land where couch burning is a thing, so we're going to cut him some slack.
Here are some old school picks from King...enjoy!
Baylor at Kansas: The things the bears will do to the Jayhawks are war crimes per the Geneva Convention, and is illegal in all 50 states. Thanks to the internet and faces of death, I feel like I've seen some absurd, horrible shit in my day, and all of that pales to this weekend. Knowing Briles, I fully expect Bebe's kids to hit 90 points. All the bear fans will have carpal tunnel from making that stupid bear claw, as they win 95-3.
Oklahoma at Texas: I've already said that Charlie Strong is jealous of Bevo, but I feel it deserves a repeat. I've heard people say that in a rivalry game you throw out the records, and I would, but Strong already threw out all his good players. The Stoops Bros reassert their manhood (though I feel eventually Mike will go Cohen brothers and become Michelle) and the Goon Train Rolls, 52-10.
Iowa State at Texas Tech: You'd think STD jokes would get old, but you'd be wrong. Although I'm not sure who's dirtier in this regard, what with Tech having crabs and the clones having the stain of betrayal on them. You know what? Fuck it I can't think of anything funny about these two teams, Mahomes is decent and the cyclones blow goat testicles. Tech wins 55-21.
Texas Christian at Kansas State: After having watched the KSU defense in person last week, I'm fairly confident that Bill Snyder has recruited Christopher Reeves to play cornerback for him. I was wondering how far down the depth chart they'd have to go to find a quarterback for this week when I got a call to report to practice Monday. I didn't even know I'd enrolled. If the Frogs have enough players on bail to field a team, they'll roll 48-27.
Oklahoma State at West Virginia: Seeing how pleasant Dave from TSM was, I'll avoid any cheap shots this week. Just go watch "The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia" and that will tell you all you need to know. Sadly those stinky bearded mountain men will win, 37-31. This marks only the 4th time I've every called a loss for OSU. The other three? You go find them.