A few years ago our friends at Wide Right Natty Light did a post much like this, but not this one exactly, where they matched Big 12 schools with characters from the hit HBO show, Game of Thrones. A lot has changed from two years ago, TCU isn't bad anymore, Baylor has sustained success, OU and Texas have continued what some have called a "decline" and OSU has been good, except for last year.
So today marks 49 days away from kickoff, so what better way to spend your time than reading our take on what the Big 12 is like compared to the show.
WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD!!! IF YOU AREN'T CAUGHT UP ON THE SHOW THEN THIS WILL CONTAIN SERIOUS SPOILERS! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!
Baylor Bears - Joffrey Baratheon
Hated by nearly the entire conference, Baylor's sudden taking of the Big 12 crown seemed to come out of nowhere and no one wanted them to be there. They proudly announce "61-58" more than Joffrey says "I am the king!" like it's supposed to mean something to the rest of us. They claim to be powerful and mighty, but when it comes down to it, they just get embarrassed and killed at their own celebration.
Iowa St. Cyclones - Arya Stark
Although Arya is small and not necessarily a main character, she does have these awesome moments and is generally well liked, much like Iowa State. Sure they don't run around changing the world or anything huge, but once a season, they will kill someone...at least their hopes and dreams, that is.
Kansas Jayhawks - Robb Stark
They went from unknown to powerful and back to nothing in a very short time, much like Rob Stark. Their historical run to the Orange Bowl will never be forgotten. For a time they were even the King of the North (Division)! But sadly, they were tricked into believing in the Freys (anyone after Mangino) and were brutally killed off.
Kansas State Wildcats - Hodor
Kansas State is generally liked by everyone and very nice, much like Hodor. Hodor doesn't say much but when he gets possessed, he kills everything in sight. Yes, WRNL had the same thing for K-State,
Oklahoma Sooners - Tywin Lanister
Both were built on old money and have words that carry a lot of weight to those who are in charge. Although they might be seen as one of the most powerful, they're still only the Hand of the King, so someone else (Texas) technically has the final say in the kingdom.
Oklahoma State Cowboys - Jon Snow
For the longest time, they were a disgrace and undesired. But then they went to a place where they were considered strong and powerful. They even became the Lord of it all! But then they were betrayed by a small child and had their lofty dreams taken from them and everyone is speculating how to get back there.
TCU Horned Frogs - Brienne of Tarth
While they may be overlooked at first for something beyond their control, they prove over and over again that they are a worthy adversary. They've proven that they don't need help to be who they are and they're generally liked by fans.
Texas Longhorns - Jaime Lannister
They used to be great but then they tarnished their own name by slaying the mad King for their own personal gain. Shortly after, they were no longer considered the great foe they once were and were nearly forgotten. After losing one of their greatest assets, they're learning to cope and become better without it but still have a long way to go.
Texas Tech Red Raiders - Prince Oberyn of Dorne
The Red Viper meets the Red Raider; two pretty-boys with an "unusual, deadly style of combat." After living for a time among the Unsullied, the Prince returns to the desert sands of Dorne on a black stallion where he quickly earns a reputation for his effect on women and pursuit of carnality. No matter where one travels throughout the Seven Kingdoms, Dornish women can be heard bragging about their Prince being hotter than all others. Employing both finesses and cunning, the Prince very nearly bests the champion - only to succumb to brute strength in the end. Like the Prince, the Red Raiders never recover from their brush with glory.
West Virginia Mountaineers - Melisandre (The Red Woman)
Both worship fire. For the night is dark and full of terrors.
BONUS ROUND - FORMER BIG 12 MEMBERS - THE DESERTERS
Colorado Buffaloes -Theon Greyjoy
They were never loved here, so they left when things got heated. They thought it would be a good idea to go to a new conference (come back and try to take over Winterfell) but ended up being another sad story that no one really cares about or feels bad for. There's some hope going into next season. Some.
Missouri Tigers -Bran Stark
While in the Big 12, Missouri (Bran) was pretty cool, winning the North three times. However, it wasn't the coolest of all the teams. Than it fell off the castle (left the conference) in 2011, and that's when things in Winterfell started going crazy. It left just in time before it was killed and burned for the SEC, where it's done some cool things, but sometimes goes unnoticed, so much so that people forget they didn't even watch them do anything for seven episodes.
Nebraska Cornhuskers - Mance Rayder
Nebraska is Mance because they both live north of the wall (Kansas border) and both (allegedly) said this when they left to take over the other side of The Wall (Big Ten).
"I'm going to light the biggest fire the North has ever seen!"
"The freedom to make my own mistakes was all I ever wanted."
Texas A&M Aggies - Tyrion Lannister
Much like Tyrion, TAMU left Kings Landing and Westeros to partner with the enemy. Usually drunk, loud and the fans love him for some reason.